Montag, 18. Oktober 2010


I need to drive through my own town (T_T)
Well I also did it when leaving it for villages or today when I had a biiiiiiiig and loooooong drive (4hours long) but well
driving in your own small hometown is a little bit different. I should wear a mask in case someone I know sees me..LOL
But I noticed that even in my own town the people I see are unknown to me. In the past it felt like I know at least every 4th person or something..but now it feels like they are all strangers. Well might be good cause so I feel better at driving..although this doesn't make me better at the traffic lights. I really suck at killing the car at every 2nd light xD

Hmm actually I dont want to talk about life much right now. It's the usual...have to work from wednesday till friday and then work period is over starting from monday I have the more stressful life for 4 weeks again..getting up too early and coming home too late. But you know..guess that's the life I have chosen by myself too, isn't it?
In the end I guess we all have that more stressful part in our life...part of our activities and existential experiences of daily life (AEDL) It's like a big experience and challenges our degree of stress resistance. Guess that if it's like this we can only become stronger as human....
I wonder if that what was said in Welcome to the NHK contains some truth..that in 90% of our life we only suffer from pain. Well so far I can't say that this is truth. Of course I don't think I had an awesome life so far and I don't expect that it will become that much more awesome...well I mean that it get that much better than it was in the past so far..cause in the end I think that happiness and sadness in life is...hmm balanced out. Of course there are many people who would say: "That's a lie. Life sucks more than I enjoy it!" Naturally people tend to realize bad and sad moments earlier than happy times. And as awkward as it is, of course the sad and bad experiences stay better on your mind for your whole life than the happy ones.
For me it's like...even if I think of happy that moments at least something bad in the end I am bothered by that small incident although the rest of that event was awesome. But it somehow destroys the whole memory regarding a certain event or something.

Like a bad stupid example...Baba's birthday last year was really awesome..but the awful memory is that I barfed into the empty salad bowl of her grandma. XD
I know really really dumb example..but I just wanted to make this entry a little bit more